As the darkness of the night lifted to the day, a dusty fog blanketed everything.
I was still feeling confused about what was happening with me. Where had my calm and positive confidence gone?
At the new bagel shop in town, everything was buzzing with energy and life.
As I read my inspirational books and sat down with my journal, my feelings started to flow onto the page, jump started by my reading. One idea after another reminding me of what I have let escape from my days – I had abandoned my quiet time, the time I need for grounding. I had let the grand invitation of the busy-ness of life lure me from what I know keeps me balanced and feeling vibrantly alive.
As I ran down the street, the yellow leaves from the tree on the corner were falling like rain.
I, too, am moving into a new season, a fresh start. My mind is focusing. I am buoyed by memories of how tough I can be (hey, I ran a marathon! I battled the beast of cancer!).
Running down the hill past the entrance to the golf course, I saw 3 gorgeous creamy mushrooms shooting up from the middle of a patch of grass.
My legs were strong. I felt tall. I, too, was reaching for the sky.
On the path through the golf course, I came within feet of a red-tailed hawk sitting on the limb of a tree. Regal. Self-assured. Looking right at me. Not really shaken by my “Hey, there!” – just invited to move on and fly in her own direction, north over the pond.
I was soaring, some kind of high coming over me. Clarity: I am good enough. No, I am amazing. I don’t have to be anybody else. Just me, moving in the direction of my dreams.
As I rounded the final turn of my run, the haze gave way to the sun, peaking through clouds.
I began to see the sketches of my dreams shine through the haze. All the pushing lately and the knocking against something has finally given way. Breaking free, with light.